March 9, 2011

Rain, rain, rain and more rain. The Lyle Love-It will be sad as he won't be able to go outside today. The puddles are deeper than he is tall.

My youngest son, Timothy, posted on his Facebook page a song and a pondering of what it will be like when his girls are grown and gone. Yes, my dear son, it is sad and very quiet. I miss my boys laughter most of all. Tim and Ian have very distinctive laughs and it is like music to my ears to hear. I also love to hear my grandchildren giggle. It as though a bell were tinkling in Heaven. I hope he and Ian get to hear the laughter of their grandkids. Maybe then they will understand just how wonderful it is to hear.

I have found that at 60 a person disappears. It is easy to forget that you exist. That you have thoughts, feelings and still love passionately. I guess with the gray hair you start to fade as a person, until you become a ghost. Most people look right past you and dismiss anything you might voice an opinion about. Ha, maybe that is why we are louder in our old age. We just want someone to fucking listen and not dismiss our thoughts.

It is odd this disappearing act that I am in right now. I've always fantasied about having the ability to disappear. But I wanted it to be on my terms, at will. This is not how it was supposed to go. Guess, that will teach me to be careful what I wish for.

I would really like to go to the ocean today and watch the waves. I need the centering that the ocean brings.

Hope everyone has a good day.

Ramblings in March

Sun is shining outside, but I am not feeling it. It is time to subtract. Painful, but what is left in life from the 60's but to let go those that wish to cause pain. Goodbye.

My dog, Lyle Love-It is always happy to see me. Guess that is all I really need now. His smile is worth so much more than a lot of people or things in my life.

Ok, so much for bemoaning life as it is right now.

I am on a rampage about the new Governor of Florida. He, like the rest of the Republican idiots voted into office this last fall, is taking on Education and Unions. I do believe that they want us to be stupid so that control will fall, even more, into the hands of the repulsive rich right. Ugh!

At the same time, I am wondering where, oh where is the left and why are they not stepping up to stop this insanity? Hopefully, come elections of 2012, they will come out of the woodwork and cause a stand against this idiocy.

The age of 60 has found me pondering who and what are really important. Certainly, those that can see beyond their own needs and those who value art, music, education are important. I just don't get those that can't get beyond themselves.

Oh, to those who are wondering.......I did get my new license and Social Security card. I am a real citizen again. Is that a good thing? I guess, as I can now drive and prove who I am. I really thought it would be fun to wear a disguise for the picture. Groucho Marx glasses and a fuzzy wig. Oh wait, that would be my own hair. Just need a cigar and a mustache.

Well, not so interesting, but real. Have a wonderful week all my readers.

March 5, 2011

Today is my brother's birthday. He is 66. I still think of him as he was when he was about 14. He was a jolly kid and could always make me laugh. I hope he has a wonderful day.

The sun has been out all day and is warm. I looked early last week and the trees were just looking fuzzy. Now the leaves are fully out and that wonderful Spring neon green. It happened so quick. I guess that is the way life is for me these days. One minute the world is one way and the next it has all changed around, and I have some how missed the change.

I was thinking of music this week. President Obama and First Lady Michelle hosted the Motown Concert at the White House. Wow, it was very good. I grew up with the Motown sound. The Temptations still get my feet tapping. When I was 16 I got see Dinah Ross and Supremes in St. Louis. It was so exciting. I just don't think there will ever be a sound like the Motown Sound again.

My youngest son called this morning. He keeps regular tabs on me. That is nice. I hope I get to go out to Kansas this summer and visit. I sure would like to meet my youngest granddaughter and catch up with Kayla. I miss them both.

My sister sent me a book of Mandalas. They are sacred circles. Very cool, I may try to paint one on the screen porch. She always seems to know how to center my joy and my pain. That is a true talent.

Nothing fun this week. It has just been a week out of so many behind and ahead.

Thoughts for Wednesday

Finally, it is March. March is one of those months that gives you hope. While not being as warm as July, the sun does bring the warmth of days promised.

I got my hair cut at the local Beauty Salon. I had never been to this particular salon and was a bit apprehensive, but it turned out well. I look a bit more like me again.

I am short and round and look stupid with long hair. When I do have my hair longer I have to keep it pulled up and away from my neck and face. I can't stand hair hanging on my neck. At 60 a ponytail looks stupid, unless your a drop dead beautiful movie star. No pretense that that look has ever happened in my life time. So it is better to keep it short. Looks much better.

I also have enough hair for me and two other people. It is strange hair. Straight on top and outer layer. Nappy and wavy underneath. I often wonder where that combination came from in my ancestry. When just washed and let to dry of it's on volition, there is a tendency to be very frizzy and point in all directions. This makes me crazy, a Then I have to dry it, curl it and hope for the best. Another reason to keep it short as this process is then a lot shorter and less hassle.

I remember when I was in high school the ideal was straight hair. I would straighten my hair with the goop that was called "Curl Free". When applied to your head it looked as though someone had blown their nose on you. It smelled awful. But it worked for about 6 weeks when I would have to do the process all over again.

Now they have this thing called the "Brazilian Blowout". It costs $350.00 and lasts a couple of months. It is a tremendous amount of work and insanely expensive. I think my curl free was maybe, 10 bucks. These folks are nuts to spend that kind of money.

I do love to go to a hometown Beauty shop. You hear all the latest gossip, news and complaints. Very funny.

My Aunt Lulu had a beauty shop and it was always fun to hang out there. My friend Jo-Ellen's mom was also a beautician. We would play for hours in that salon doing each other's hair. I can't imagine Maxine enjoyed the mess when we were done. We sure had a great time though.

I think about all the hair styles throughout my growing up years. My first haircut came when I was about 5. I had long hair and Mom would stand me on a dining room chair to comb it. I can remember yelling, "your killing me". Not long after that I got a "DA". Very short with a duck tail. I remember the name thinking that was a stupid name for a hair cut and why did haircuts have names. I don't think I really thought about hair until I was in Junior High. I can remember practicing putting rollers in my hair. When I roll my hair today, I do it exactly the same way that I learned way back then. In high school I remember sleeping under the hair dryer in bed. I wonder now if that was a safety hazard. I used enormous rollers to help make my hair straighter.

I saw a girl the other day that had one of those haircuts that is shorter in back and long in the front. I just had to laugh. That is exactly the way we wore our hair in the late 60's. I chatted with her for a few seconds and told her that I wore my hair that way 40 + years ago. She looked at me like I was nuts. Maybe so, but I have pictures to prove it.

Have a wonderful week to all the readers of this insane blog.

Sunday, Bucket List

I saw the movie "The Bucket List", and while it really wasn't a very good movie, I decided to make one for myself. I thought I would share some of it with you.

I would like a week with my boys, Ian and Timothy. No kids, no wives. Just me and my boys.

I would like to visit Great Britain, and Ireland. Just a search for ancestors and feel the English soil under my feet.

Again, I want a new VW convertible, black, navigation system, and a kick butt sound system.

I want mannequin arms to put in my garden. Odd, yes, I know. Maybe my way of waving goodbye.

A week in a beach house. I live within 30 miles of the beach, but I can't hear the waves at night. This house should also come equipped with an industrial blender for making Cranberry Margaritas.

I would like my ashes shot into space when I die. However, my wonderful niece gave me a great idea, just in case the cost of space is out of the question. Just pack my ashes into fireworks and have a hell of a 4th of July.

Ride in a hot air balloon. This goes back to my wanting to go to Oz.

See the summer solstice at Stonehenge. See the sunset at Key West. See sunrise in Nova Scotia.

An entire summer to travel to Illinois, Kansas, and South Dakota.

A week with my sister and brother. Just the 3 of us. No kids allowed.

A week with all my kids and grandkids.

Whale watching. Not in one of those annoying little boats, but from a place that wouldn't disturb them.

Ride on the Orient Express. That costing to much then I would settle for a train trip across America.

So that is my list so far. There are lots of little things that pass through my thoughts but these are the really important ones. I know that most won't happen but who knows, maybe one or two will come true.

Feb. 22,2011

Sorry it has taken me so long to add to this blog. I've been wrapped in Bureaucratic stupidity for the last few days.

Granted, I am the world's worst procrastinator and tend do things last minute or late, but this has been pure insanity.

My drivers license expired on my birthday. We didn't have the ridiculous sum of near $70.00 to get it renewed. So now that we have come up with the money, I have to prove to these idiots who I am. I have a Social Security card, but again (due to procrastination) I just never changed my name on it. Oh my, that is a major sin according to the government. So instead of just taking all the tiny bits of paper and other stuff with my name on it and my SS #, I had to prove that indeed I am who I am. Not an easy task, when you really don't want to be who you are in the first place.

So after hours spent in the SS office and getting that mess straightened out, I will be off to the DMV to spend hours to renew my drivers license. I am sure that by the end of the day I will be in a lovely mood and will nearly be "postal".

OK, so that explains where I have been. In case you were wondering.

Last weekend was wonderful. Both Hannah and Christopher were here. It was great to have them here.I love to hear their laughter and just visit. Oh, and I got a couple of hugs and a kiss or two. Happy Grandma here.

I also want to rant on this whole thing with the Unions. Did you know that the first union protest was......are you ready........ Laborers protesting the Royal Taxation at the Boston Tea Party? I wonder if those idiot Tea Parry of to day would admit to that? Oh yes, I suppose they would do their usual whining about how the rich are so over taxed. In 1773, Philadelphia printers had the first strike for wage increase. In 1834 "Mill Girls" in Lowell, Mass. struck for the protection from wage cuts.

The Unions have a long history of protecting workers from the rich and powerful. Without them our labor force would be without minimum wages, health care, and a million other things that management would love to deny its workers.

We are a union household. Granted, there have been times when I wanted to scream at the Union Rep. for not doing his job, but all in all, the Union has provided for a good living.

If you have read all the entries on this blog you will know where I stand politically and know that I support the middle and lower class citizens. So get use to this ranting, it may go on for a very long time.

Now, on to more of the silly thoughts that have entered my 60 year old head. Last night there was a small discussion of "swashbuckling pirates". I wondered what a "swash" was and why did it require a buckle. Then I thought of Johnny Depp (my favorite pirate). He did swashing to a fault. Or at least, what I think of swashing would be. However, it does mean to be rough, noisy, and boastful. The buckle has something to do with the way a sword is held in a fight. I still prefer Depps portrayal of a pirate. Just a tad on the feminine side with a swish in the walk.

Fernandina Beach, Florida has a weekend festival called the Shrimp Festival. It is parades, arts, food and loads of fun. Lots of shrimp to eat in a variety of ways. Also there are Pirates everywhere. Fun and bawdy. If you ever get a chance to come to Florida, you really should go to the Shrimp Festival. I have enjoyed every year since moving here.

I do hope to keep up a little better on this writing. Oh, a news flash.......I have lots of Robins in yard today. So those of you who live in the north, it won't be long and they will be on their way to a yard near you.

Women

I've been thinking about women and how our lives have changed. Mostly, about the women of my family and women I have known.

My family had extremely strong and outgoing women. My grandmothers, although vastly different, were strong in their own ways. Grandma Toberman was a proper Victorian lady. She required proper manners, no crying, no smoking, no dating anyone that might be a foreigner, after the age of 12 you were required to wear a dress or skirt at all times. She was no fun and way to rigid. Grandma Best was also a proper lady but was not as stern. She taught me to make "mud pies" and to decorate them with corn. She let me climb trees, play in the hayloft, milk the cow with grandpa and play at the piano. She was strong and intelligent.

The next generation of women included my mom (Margaret), my aunts (Lulu, Alberta, and Geraldine). My mom was a funny and outgoing woman. I think she always was put down by her mother and always felt less than her sister. As I said, my Grandma Toberman, was not a nice woman. However, my mom was strong. Dad was on the road a lot and so she was left to raise 3 kids, for the most part, alone. She had a wicked sense of humor and an even more determined sense of right and wrong. She was a strong Democrat and she hated Richard Nixon.

I think that is so funny. I am sure that is where I get my political views. Her humor is how she coped most of the time. She could make you laugh and wasn't afraid to make silly when needed. She did have a dark side. There was an abiding sadness. Sometimes, that was hard for my sister, brother, and I to take. I truly believe that we all knew that she loved us, but sometimes it was hard.

My Aunts were all strong women in their own right. Aunt Lulu suffered for decades with Rheumatoid Arthritis. It was a wicked evil disease. Her sense of humor was well in tact also. I think I will remember her laughter as long as I live. Aunt Alberta was a lovely caring woman. She had lost her husband early in life and raised their son Bill as a single woman. She also had a sense of silliness. Aunt Geraldine (Aunt Toots) was fun and loving. I always thought of her as the ultimate 50's woman. She was always dressed to the nines and ready to entertain at a moments notice. I don't think I ever saw her in anything but dresses and heels.

Now, we move on to my generation. My cousins: Mary, Beverly, Linda and then me and my sister. Mary was another of those perfect 50's women. Always dressed to the nines, perfect manners, a polite sense of humor, and a strong woman. Beverly, Linda, Carole and I are all for the most part more laid back. Beverly got the wicked sense of humor. She knows more jokes than anyone I know. Linda was always my idol. I thought the sun came up and set on Linda. I never could think of Linda as anything but perfect. Carole, my sister, well, I can't think of anything but that I am blessed to have her. She is my rock. Smart, funny, and strong.

There are women who will follow us, daughters and granddaughters to carry on the family. They are all wonderful young women. Then we also have the women who have married our sons. Thank goodness our sons were smart enough to marry wonderful, smart and funny women.

Well, here is to all the women, past, present and future. You come from a long line of wonderful, smart and funny women. Carry on!